Importance of Family Connections and Family Portraits
Why are connections important? To answer this question, let me go back to my beginnings. I was adopted as an infant. I don’t have any details other than my adoptive parents were unable to have children. Through another family member, they learned of a lady who was pregnant and it would be better for her and the baby if she was able to give it up through adoption. This began the process that eventually resulted in me being adopted by my new, loving and very excited parents. I grew up an only child, but my mom had 10 brothers and sisters. Yes, you read correctly! That means growing up I had lots of aunts, uncles and cousins and we spent lots of time together. It was great. And while I sometimes wished for a larger immediate family with brothers and sisters of my own, I considered myself quite fortunate to have a variety of cousins to help teach me things and get me into trouble that I likely would not have come across on my own!
Now life, as is often the case, was not always rosy. My parents had their fare share of issues that eventually led to a divorce. And my mom had to have major surgery and we went to live with my aunt and then my cousins while my mom recovered, and so I could get to school. All this started on or around my 8th birthday. My memory is sketchy during some of those years and I know that after my parents divorced, there were new challenges for mom and I. She did not know how to drive a car and even if she did, we only had one car that daddy took with him when he left. I walked to school and to girl scouts. And we had to walk to the grocery store and to the drug store where they had a counter with stools to get hamburgers cooked on a flat grill and French fries. That made it worth the walk!
This is not meant to be a sob story and no permanent damage was done. Dad stayed in my life, as well as mom’s, and eventually they got back together. Shortly after, when I was 15, my dad died from a major heart attack. He had suffered a number of heart attacks prior to this one, including a couple of major ones, but this was to be his last. Mom and I were alone and on our own again! But we were both survivors. We had managed on our own in the past, and despite the sadness, we knew we would make it and we did.
Fast forward to me being 30 years old, married and with 2 kids of my own. My mom was diagnosed with cancer in February and was gone by May. That was devastating to me. As a teenager when my father died, because he traveled for work so much, as well as he and mom being divorced, his absence often left me thinking he was just away and would be coming home. When mom died, I was old enough to feel the weight and significance of losing my only remaining parent and now my children’s grandmother. And I knew how much she loved me and sacrificed for me for so many years and I was sad that my children would not have more time with her – she was so excited to be a grandmother.
So by this point, perhaps you are thinking, nice story but “What is the point?” The point is the value of the connections in our lives. These connections are often taken for granted until something significant happens that awakens us to their importance. When our children live in another city, or state, or further away, that can be challenging enough, but when they have children, your grandchildren, that’s an entirely different matter! You are connected to those grandchildren and you want them to feel connected to you! Maybe you and your siblings are no longer close, either because of distance or because life circumstances have pulled you apart. But you still have that connection.
Our connections are everything. They helped shape us into the people we are today. They likely influenced our core values. You likely have shared memories. And when we and our connections are no longer on this Earth, what will be left behind to tell future generations about us will be the stories we passed down verbally, in writing, and in photographs.
Hanging on the wall in my studio is a statement I truly believe - Every family deserves family portraits displayed in their home showing their love and connection to each other!
How will you honor and preserve your family connections?